代际同居中的“边界”协商：以照顾孙辈为核心的代际合作与摩擦

The “Boundary Negotiation” in Intergenerational Cohabitation: Intergenerational Cooperation and Friction with the Care of Grandchildren as the Core

摘要: 在当代中国的家庭变迁背景下，因子女一代需要协助照顾第三代而引发的代际共居现象日益普遍。以孙辈照料为核心动因形成的多代同居，可视作一种代际合作机制，其运行过程伴随持续的边界协商。本研究采用质性研究方法，通过对12个三代共居家庭的深度访谈与参与式观察，旨在揭示同居代际之间在物理空间、责任分工、情感卷入与家庭权力四个维度上的边界建构、协商与摩擦过程。研究发现，代际同居并非简单的“单方索取”，而是一种基于“相互需要”的互惠合作。然而，合作中“边界”的模糊性常常引发摩擦：在空间维度体现为私密性与共享性的冲突，在责任维度体现为科学育儿理念与传统经验之间的张力，在情感维度表现为亲密需求与个体独立之间的矛盾，在权力维度则体现为家庭事务决策主导权的竞争。这些摩擦的根源在于个体化进程中代际间价值观、生活方式的差异，以及“夹心世代”在多重角色压力下的资源分配紧张。有效的边界调适依赖于代际关系的亲密基础、沟通质量以及规则共识的形成，从而可能导向代际关系的相对平衡状态。本研究从微观层面呈现了当代中国家庭在结构变动中的调适过程与内在张力，为理解代际共居模式下的互动逻辑提供了经验依据，并对构建和谐代际关系及完善相关家庭支持政策具有参考意义。

Abstract: In the context of contemporary family transformation in China, the intergenerational co-residence model, formed to assist adult children in caring for the third generation (grandchildren), has become increasingly common. This living arrangement, centered on the core demand of “grandchild care,” is essentially a complex system of intergenerational cooperation fraught with ongoing “boundary” negotiations. This study employs qualitative research methods, including in-depth interviews and participant observation with 12 three-generation co-residing families, aiming to reveal the processes of boundary construction, negotiation, and friction between co-residing generations across four dimensions: physical space, division of responsibilities, emotional involvement, and family power. The research finds that intergenerational co-residence is not a simple case of “one-sided demand” but rather a reciprocal cooperation based on “mutual need”. However, the ambiguity of “boundaries” within this cooperation often triggers friction: conflicts between privacy and sharing over spatial boundaries, collisions between “scientific parenting” and “empiricism” over responsibility boundaries, contradictions between intimacy and independence over emotional boundaries, and struggles over decision-making dominance regarding power boundaries. The root of these frictions lies in the differences in values and lifestyles between generations during the process of individualization, as well as the tension in resource allocation under the multiple role pressures faced by the “sandwich generation”. Successful boundary negotiation relies on intimate intergenerational relationships, high-quality communication, and clear consensus on rules, ultimately leading to the ideal state of “triple-generation prosperity”. This study provides a micro-perspective for understanding the dynamic adaptability and internal tensions of contemporary Chinese families and offers insights for constructing harmonious intergenerational relationships and improving family support policies.